Mike Oppenheim×
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In his regular column "The Life of a Hotel Doctor", Mike Oppenheim shares remarkable stories around visiting hotel guests as a doctor.


Long Time No See - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

"Hey, Doctor! It's been a while." I love it when parking valets recognize me. That was the good news. The 'it's been a while' was not so good. This was my first visit of the year to Le Parc, an upscale

Ever Hopeful - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

Years ago, I shared a Four Seasons elevator with Robert Duvall. He was reading a script, and I pretended not to notice. I've received several dozen calls to see Four Seasons guests from travel insurance

Another Summer - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

A wave of heat poured out of the guest's room as he opened the door. "Another summer has arrived," I reminded myself. It was 90 degrees outside but certainly more in the room. I remembered with regret

A Dog-Eat-Dog Business - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

Waiting at the local carwash, my eye ran over a sheet of ads along one wall. Among notices for personal injury lawyers, pest control, acupuncturists, and pizzas was a photo of a smiling young man in a

A Critical Feature - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

The Airport Hilton has a long entrance drive that accommodates perhaps twenty parked cars without blocking traffic. Le Mondrian has a tiny drive that fits three or four. These are critical features in

Things Hotel Guests Ask That I Can’t - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

"A shot to put her out." More than once I'm called when a guest suffers a tragic loss such as the death of a child or spouse. Distressed to witness the misery, family members want me to put her to sleep

Another Stoic - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

"She thinks her drink was spiked," explained the caller whose friend was bent over the toilet, vomiting. I explained that alcohol is a toxic drug and occasionally provokes this reaction. Common stomach

A Special Service - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

"Someone needs to check my nephew. He's shaking and really upset. How quick can you be here?" The child was in good health before a fire alarm roused everyone from bed at midnight. He seemed frightened

Cheap Motels are Easy - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

Cheap motels have many advantages from a hotel doctor's point of view. Valets are absent, so I can park inside and safely ignore the threatening signs. Security is absent, so I don't have to explain myself

Lost in Translation Again - The Life of a Hotel Doctor

"Speak Spanish?" Two of my least favorite words. Ninety percent of Latin American guests speak enough English to get along, and Hispanic hotel staff are usually available. Unfortunately, this visit occurred